5 Types of People to Let Go of for the New Year

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Oh 2011, how I’m ready for you with a vengeance. Already I know that I’ll need steely determination, better time management, more money (‘cause we always need more of that), and a great circle of people (which I already do) to pump me up with motivation, when I’m tempted to call it a day, and go build a shack in the mountains.
I’m entering the new year, sans resolutions. All I have are ‘must-dos’, and to do them I probably need an army to attack the high pile that awaits me. The chance of getting an army between now and January 1st is pretty slim though, so as any amateur, and sometime-ish, student of Sun Tzu would do, I’m creating my own edition of “The Art of War”.
See. Sometimes we think we need an army to accomplish our personal and professional goals, when all we need is an A-team. Any good general knows it’s better to have a small team of dedicated guerillas, than a fancily decked-out, large army of soldiers, and the only way to zero in on your super circle of friends and partners in success is to say “buh bye” to the people who subtract from your energy, multiply your stress, and add to your frustration. I don’t mean this in a negative way. All I’m saying is that you have the opportunity to shape your path, by wisely choosing who you walk with.
So here’s a list of some of the people it’d be best to give a Wendy wave, or a “talk to you from afar” for 2011.
1. People who promise, but don’t deliver
The average person dislikes politicians for this very reason; they promise you the world, and never deliver. Do you know anyone like that? If you do, then it’s probably a good idea to not depend on them… for anything… at all. They’ll promise to help you out, and not show up, take your phone calls or respond to e-mails.
For 2011, you need to establish a strike rule. You know three strikes and you’re out? Turn it into one strike and you’re out; and if they struck out in 2010, well, you know what to do.
With that said, reliable people are difficult to find. So if you’re blessed enough to have them in your life, show them some appreciation, because they are that small, guerilla group, who will be there for you… whenever you need them.
2. Man, and woman, who does send yuh mad
Now I doh have a man. So this one is not for me. But I know there are loads of ladies out there who let men ‘hurt their head’, and vice versa. Ladies and gents, if you’re seeing someone who keeps you a heartbeat away from a stroke, it’s time to bounce.
Remember the one strike rule I mentioned above? Use it here too. A person is only allowed to send you mad once. So if your romantic interest keeps you on a roller coast, come off at the next stop, and find another park to play in.
I’m not being a hater. I’m just trying to help you avoid wasting your time, emotions, and money. Where does money come into this? Well, just think about all the ice cream you buy (to eat your sorrows away), the cell phone minutes you use (complaining to all of your friends, and ultimately ‘eating up’ your credit), and the tab you pile up, going to parties, bars, and the cinema, trying to participate in any activity that takes your mind off the drama. If you calculate your tabanca tab, you’ll know it’s reason enough to say, “get out meh way”.
Forget Beyoncé’s “to the left, to the left”. You need something more forceful.
3. Fair-weather friends
While you’re getting rid of drama in the love department, say hasta la vista to fair-weather friends. They’re the ones who only call you when they need something – and never answer when you need assistance. They remember you exist only when they’re single, and need a wingman/woman. They talk about themselves incessantly – even if you called to tell them about something horrible that happened to you, and they show up for your fancy parties, but never for your solo cry sessions. Oh, fair-weather friends also equate friendship with what you have. So got a car? They’re your liming buddy. Let that car shut down? You’re on your own.
These are the people who you don’t have to feel badly about when you delete them from BBM, or don’t give them ‘small talk’ on Facebook anymore. Besides, they aren’t the ones you’re going to call when you need help, right?
4. Liars and hypocrites
Having the right circle of people around you is something people tend to be very lax about. However, you’ve got to screen everyone you let into your personal space, especially the liars and hypocrites. These are the people who will lie to you (obviously), saying one thing in front of your face, and telling others something else behind your back. They’ll attempt to destroy your reputation, and plot to block you from your dreams too.
The remedy for this is easy. Ignore them.
Next.
5. Negativity lovers
These include toxic friends, who forever criticize you or ‘pull you down’ in the name of ‘concern’.  If they were really that concerned, they’d apply criticism in a more constructive manner that’s meant to simply show you the light, rather than make you feel worse. Then there are those people who always show you how what you want to achieve cannot prosper.
Add judgmental folks and people with ulterior motives to this group, and you’ll realize it’s not just Batman who has to watch his back. Not everyone who offers to help you is doing it out of ‘the goodness of their heart’. So consider asking Santa to switch that iPad you got… for a spirit of discernment.
As we move into the new year, it’s important to not just ask yourself what you want to achieve, but also who you’d like to achieve it with. Often, we get pushed into a corner, where we allow people to have their way, because we don’t want to seem like Judge Dredd. However, even the sweetest person needs to learn how to ‘stand up’ for himself or herself.
More importantly, while we let go of negative situations, it’s so very necessary to embrace and appreciate the people in our lives who help us to visualize and actualize our dreams.

Oh year of new, how I’m ready for you with a vengeance. Already I know that I’ll need steely determination, better time management, more money (‘cause we always need more of that), and a great circle of people (which I already do) to pump me up with motivation, when I’m tempted to call it a day, and go build a shack in the mountains.

I’m entering the new year, sans resolutions. All I have are ‘must-dos’, and to do them I probably need an army to attack the high pile that awaits me. The chance of getting an army between now and January 1st is pretty slim though, so as any amateur, and sometime-ish, student of Sun Tzu would do, I’m creating my own edition of “The Art of War”.

See. Sometimes we think we need an army to accomplish our personal and professional goals, when all we need is an A-team. Any good general knows it’s better to have a small team of dedicated guerillas, than a fancily decked-out, large army of soldiers, and the only way to zero in on your super circle of friends and partners in success is to say “buh bye” to the people who subtract from your energy, multiply your stress, and add to your frustration. I don’t mean this in a negative way. All I’m saying is that you have the opportunity to shape your path, by wisely choosing who you walk with.

So here’s a list of some of the people it’d be best to give a Wendy wave, or a “talk to you from afar” for the new year.

1. People who promise, but don’t deliver

The average person dislikes politicians for this very reason; they promise you the world, and never deliver. Do you know anyone like that? If you do, then it’s probably a good idea to not depend on them… for anything… at all. They’ll promise to help you out, and not show up, take your phone calls or respond to e-mails.

For the new year, you need to establish a strike rule. You know three strikes and you’re out? Turn it into one strike and you’re out; and if they struck out this year, well, you know what to do.

With that said, reliable people are difficult to find. So if you’re blessed enough to have them in your life, show them some appreciation, because they are that small, guerilla group, who will be there for you… whenever you need them.

2. Man, and woman, who does send yuh mad

Now I doh have a man. So this one is not for me. But I know there are loads of ladies out there who let men ‘hurt their head’, and vice versa. Ladies and gents, if you’re seeing someone who keeps you a heartbeat away from a stroke, it’s time to bounce.

Remember the one strike rule I mentioned above? Use it here too. A person is only allowed to send you mad once. So if your romantic interest keeps you on a roller coast, come off at the next stop, and find another park to play in.

I’m not being a hater. I’m just trying to help you avoid wasting your time, emotions, and money. Where does money come into this? Well, just think about all the ice cream you buy (to eat your sorrows away), the cell phone minutes you use (complaining to all of your friends, and ultimately ‘eating up’ your credit), and the tab you pile up, going to parties, bars, and the cinema, trying to participate in any activity that takes your mind off the drama. If you calculate your tabanca tab, you’ll know it’s reason enough to say, “get out meh way”.

Forget Beyoncé’s “to the left, to the left”. You need something more forceful.

3. Fair-weather friends

While you’re getting rid of drama in the love department, say hasta la vista to fair-weather friends. They’re the ones who only call you when they need something – and never answer when you need assistance. They remember you exist only when they’re single, and need a wingman/woman. They talk about themselves incessantly – even if you called to tell them about something horrible that happened to you, and they show up for your fancy parties, but never for your solo cry sessions. Oh, fair-weather friends also equate friendship with what you have. So got a car? They’re your liming buddy. Let that car shut down? You’re on your own.

These are the people who you don’t have to feel badly about when you delete them from BBM, or don’t give them ‘small talk’ on Facebook anymore. Besides, they aren’t the ones you’re going to call when you need help, right?

4. Liars and hypocrites

Having the right circle of people around you is something people tend to be very lax about. However, you’ve got to screen everyone you let into your personal space, especially the liars and hypocrites. These are the people who will lie to you (obviously), saying one thing in front of your face, and telling others something else behind your back. They’ll attempt to destroy your reputation, and plot to block you from your dreams too.

The remedy for this is easy. Ignore them.

Next.

5. Negativity lovers

These include toxic friends, who forever criticize you or ‘pull you down’ in the name of ‘concern’.  If they were really that concerned, they’d apply criticism in a more constructive manner that’s meant to simply show you the light, rather than make you feel worse. Then there are those people who always show you how what you want to achieve cannot prosper.

Add judgmental folks and people with ulterior motives to this group, and you’ll realize it’s not just Batman who has to watch his back. Not everyone who offers to help you is doing it out of ‘the goodness of their heart’. So consider asking Santa to switch that iPad you got… for a spirit of discernment.

As we move into the new year, it’s important to not just ask yourself what you want to achieve, but also who you’d like to achieve it with. Often, we get pushed into a corner, where we allow people to have their way, because we don’t want to seem like Judge Dredd. However, even the sweetest person needs to learn how to ‘stand up’ for himself or herself.

More importantly, while we let go of negative situations, it’s so very necessary to embrace and appreciate the people in our lives who help us to visualize and actualize our dreams.

Karel Mc Intosh

Karel Mc Intosh is the Founder and Editor-in-Chief of Outlish Magazine. She's also the Lead Communications Trainer at Livewired Group, where she conducts workshops in business writing, social media, and other communications areas. A real online junkie, when she isn't surfing the Internet, she's thinking about surfing the Internet. Find out more about her here or tweet her @outlishmagazine.

4 Comments

  1. amanda mcv

    December 27, 2010 at 2:42 am

    with so few people focusing on anyone other than themselves, to have the gift of discernment would be such a blessing. Self seekers and opportunistic people run rampant.

  2. Aiane

    December 23, 2015 at 5:58 pm

    Observations from the picture-Excess water (juice) in the clay potVery litlte oil being used. Suggestions to enhance the quality:1. clean oysters and drain until dry, use a litlte salt and white pepper to marinate the fresh oysters;2. bring water to just about to boil, add a small piece of ginger and green onion, put oysters and cook for a couple of minutes (about way cooked), drain and dry the oysters again.3. coat the oysters with a thin layer of corn starch to absorb the water (actually retain the juice from the oysters)4. heat up a wok of hot oil, put oysters in and run hot oil through for no more than 2 or 3 minutes (depends on the sizes of the oysters) until oysters stiff up and the starch turns light golden brown, 5. At the same time, heat up your clay pot with 1 or 2 tablespoon of hot oil, with 1 teaspoon each of chopped up garlic and shallot, put sliced ginger and chopped onion in, use a pair of chopsticks to stir fry the ingredients for a min., 6. Use a drainer to retrieve the oysters from the hot oil quickly, put oysters into the clay pot and mix them with the ginger and onion, kick up the fire to highest;7. Add a pre-mixed source which include: sugar (to balance the MSG in the oyster source), corn starch, Lee Kam Kee old style oyster source, a dash of dark soy source (for color), water (or broth), Chinese cooking wine. Cover the clay pot for a litlte while until the source gets thickened, stir up the ingredients as needed. 8. Served hot with 2001 Napa Merlot or 1999 Chateau St. Michelle Cabinet Sauvignon. Because of the brown source being used, Chardonnay doesn’t quite match.

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    October 12, 2016 at 3:40 am

    Wow… what a great post! I am sure there are many people who are faced with the same problems I recently had. I couldn’t find an online service for merging PDF files, but eventually I found a simple one. I just merged 3 PDF files with an online software. I used https://goo.gl/TN8xiy and it’s very easy to use.

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    October 22, 2016 at 11:03 am

    I don’t know Scampi, I just saw this on a reel and thought it was good – I agree the direction is excellent.I thought the reason it was backwards was to start with the horrible moment that everyone in that position is scared of. Then work back from that point to show how it came about from a normal-ish chain of events that could happen to anyone if they weren’t ‘prepared’.It was interesting to watch. kept my attention, and made its point.That’s pretty good.

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